Where the term smart ass came from

I couldn’t resist sharing this.  My girlfriend sent it in an email and I’m still LMAO.  Ironically I’ve known here since were 2 and 3 years old and when we were kids she had no ass.  I always envied her.  So to me this was even funnier.


With time, women gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously Cultured, educated and happy.

Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, Good grief, look how smart I am!

Must be where ‘Smart Ass’ came from!

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Now for some  really fun news.  OUR KrAzY kitchen turns one year old in just 3 weeks on June 27th.  We would love for you to join us as we throw ourselves a birthday bash.  On Simply Delicious Sunday we will have a link for you to add your favorite recipe for birthday cake or whatever.  The KrAzIeR the better.  Be sure to join us and celebrate!

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THE BAPTIST WHITE LIE CAKE ~ A little Sunday Morning Humor

Have you ever told a white lie? You are going to love this, especially all of the ladies who bake for church events.

Alice Grayson was to bake a cake for the Baptist Church Ladies’ Group in Tuscaloosa , but forgot to do it until the last minute.

She remembered it the morning of the bake sale and after rummaging through cabinets, found an angel food cake mix & quickly made it while drying her hair, dressing, and helping her son pack up for Scout camp.

When she took the cake from the oven, the center had dropped flat and the cake was horribly disfigured and she exclaimed, “Oh dear, there is not time to bake another cake!”
 
This cake was important to Alice because she did so want to fit in at her new church, and in her new community of friends.  So, being inventive, she looked around the house for something to build up the center of the cake. She found it in the bathroom – a roll of toilet paper. She plunked it in and then covered it with icing.

Not only did the finished product look beautiful, it looked perfect. And, before she left the house to drop the cake by the church and head for work,  Alice  woke her daughter and gave her some money and specific instructions to be at the bake sale the moment it opened at 9:30 and to buy the cake and bring it home. When the daughter arrived at the sale, she found the attractive, perfect cake had already been sold. Amanda grabbed her cell phone & called her mom.

Alice was horrified-she was beside herself! Everyone would know! What would they think? She would be ostracized, talked about, ridiculed! All night,  Alice  lay awake in bed thinking about people pointing fingers at her and talking about her behind her back.

The next day, Alice  promised herself she would try not to think about the cake and would attend the fancy luncheon/bridal shower at the home of a fellow church member and try to have a good time.  She did not really want to attend because the hostess was a snob who more than once had looked down her nose at the fact that Alice was a single parent and not from the founding families of Tuscaloosa, but having already RSVP’d , she couldn’t think of a believable excuse to stay home.

The meal was elegant, the company was definitely upper crust old south and to Alice’s horror, the cake in question was presented for dessert!  Alice  felt the blood drain from her body when she saw the cake!  She started out of her chair to tell the hostess all about it, but before she could get to her feet, the Mayor’s wife said, “What a beautiful cake!”

Alice, still stunned, sat back in her chair when she heard the hostess (who was a prominent church member) say, “Thank you, I baked it myself..”

Alice smiled and thought to herself, “God is good.”

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Chicken and Onions in White Wine Cream Sauce

4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1/3 cup flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon white pepper
1/4 cup butter
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 small white onion, sliced and split into rings
1/3 cup white wine
2 tablespoons dried parsley
3/4 cup whipping cream

In a shallow bowl sift together the flour, salt and pepper. Coat chicken with flour mixture and pat firm caking the flour into all the crevices. In a large skillet heat together the butter and olive oil. Saute’ the onion rings until browned and beginning to caramelize. Add the chicken and cook until brown on both sides and cooked through. Remove the chicken and onions and set aside. Add the wine and cook for 2 minutes until heated through. Add the parsley and whipping cream, cooking over low heat until sauce thickens. Serve over chicken and mashed potatoes. Top with the onions.
Now for the really fun news.  OUR KrAzY kitchen turns one year old in just 3 weeks on June 27th.  We would love for you to join us as we throw ourselves a birthday bash.  Right here on Simply Delicious Sunday we will have a link for you to add your favorite recipe for birthday cake or whatever.  The KrAzIeR the better.  Be sure to join us and celebrate!

SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE

As many of you know I have spent the last 7 1/2 months helping out various  family members around the country.  First it was my elderly in-laws  who begged us to come help them sell everything including the house and move them closer to family (we all know how that went – FIL is still trying to assign sentimental prices to everything in sight) and now it is my aunt & uncle.  My aunt has end stage Parkinsons disease, such a sad disease.  My aunt is extremely artistic and a beautiful painter – or at least she was.  The Dyskinesia from the Parkinsons disease has robbed her of that ability. 

My uncle recently saw the Oprah episode on hoaders and has decided that my aunt is one.  Trust me, she isn’t.  I once worked for a real estate company as a stager for homes and they would send me in to work on homes that were similar to those on the Oprah show – those were horrible.  So ask yourself, what is my (your) happy medium on the stuff I’ve (you’ve) accumulated?  My theory?  If you have a place for each item and it’s in its place, you’re NOT a pack rat or a hoarder.  I do offer you the definitions below.


She does have a LARGE collection of art supplies and empty tins for storing those items in, but in her defense men do think in simpler terms and this is just a meeting of the minds discussion.  And in his defense they should be getting rid of most of this as she is now in a assisted living home and will not be able to use these items again.  Donating them to the church or a school while they are still usable would be best, but can’t be forced.  I pray that I will have more grace regarding these type of decisions if I reach that point and give up things more willingly, but none of us can ever be in one another’s shoes and truly know what we would do.


  • Also called trade rat. a large, bushy-tailed rodent, Neotoma cinerea, of North America, noted for carrying off small articles to store in its nest.
  • A person who collects, saves, or hoards useless small items or an old prospector or guide.

HOARD 

  • a supply or accumulation that is hidden or carefully guarded for preservation, future use, etc…  
  • to accumulate money, food, or the like, in a hidden or carefully guarded place for preservation, future use, etc…

NOW FOR A LIGHTER TOPIC:JELL-O TRICKS

I think most everyone knows this trick by now, but it always amazes me how much better it makes a bowl of Jell-O so I thought it was worth mentioning again.Around our house we usually put canned fruit (peaches or pears usually) in the Jell-O for a little bit of extra OOMPH! When you drain those canned fruits, use a sieve and drain them into the measuring cup for the cold water first. Then just add enough water to bring the level to where you need it. I usually get about 1 1/4 cup of fruit juice. Doing this will make for a better, more substantial flavor to any Jell-O.

Just after I pour in the Jell-o I use a small salad fork to stir up the fruit in each bowl. The fruit is usually well distributed in the Jell-O.

We also don’t like the film that forms on the top. And I hated trying to stack all the bowls in the refrigerator, so I started using my Pampered Chef prep bowls for making Jell-O. Once you’ve made it, put the lids on and you can easily stack them in the frig.

If I keep this made, we both tend to eat this at night when the munchies strike and stay away from the chips and ice cream.

Chicken & Onions in white wine cream sauce

4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1/3 cup flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon white pepper
1/4 cup butter
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 small white onion, sliced and split into rings
1/3 cup white wine
2 tablespoons dried parsley
3/4 cup whipping cream

In a shallow bowl sift together the flour, salt and pepper. Coat chicken with flour mixture and pat firm caking the flour into all the crevices. In a large skillet heat together the butter and olive oil. Saute’ the onion rings until browned and beginning to caramelize. Add the chicken and cook until brown on both sides and cooked through. Remove the chicken and onions and set aside. Add the wine and cook for 2 minutes until heated through. Add the parsley and whipping cream, cooking over low heat until sauce thickens. Serve over chicken and mashed potatoes. Top with the onions.

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WEEKLY MENU

Menu Plan Monday hosted by Laura at I’m an Organizing Junkie


DATE BREAKFAST LUNCH DINNER
MONDAY 6/7 CEREAL SANDWICHES Recipe Experiment Night
TUESDAY 6/8 TOAST LEFTOVERS Potato Pancakes
and Pork Tenderloin
WEDNESDAY 6/9 YOGURT SOUP Twisted Pepper Steak
THURSDAY 6/10 FRUIT CHEESE & FRUIT Hungarian Goulash
FRIDAY 6/11 OATMEAL C.O.R.N. 12 Hour Salad
SATURDAY 6/12 Depression Eggs leftovers Seafood Salad
SUNDAY 6/13 Hash Brown Casserole Monte’ Cristos Chicken Fried Chicken &
Parmesan Potatoes with
Peppered Gravy

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Life…

Life has this funny way of testing us and sneaking in trials and tribulations that  weren’t in our original game plan and never quite fit into “OUR” plans for life.  That is how it’s been for me the past many months.
As many of you know I have spent the last 7 1/2 months helping out various  family members around the country.  First it was my elderly in-laws  (MIL just turned 90) who begged us to come help them sell everything including the house and move them closer to family (we all know how that went – FIL is still trying to assign sentimental prices to everything in sight) and now it is my aunt & uncle.  My aunt has end stage Parkinsons disease, such a sad disease.  My aunt is extremely artistic and a beautiful painter – or at least she was.  The Dyskinesia from the Parkinsons disease has robbed her of that ability. 

My uncle recently saw the Oprah episode on hoaders and has decided that my aunt is one.  Trust me, she isn’t.  I once worked for a real estate company as a stager for homes and they would send me in to work on homes that were similar to those on the Oprah show – those were horrible.  So ask yourself, what is my (your) happy medium on the stuff I’ve (you’ve) accumulated?  My theory?  If you have a place for each item and it’s in its place, you’re NOT a pack rat or a hoarder.  I do offer you the definitions below.


This is one of my favorite’s of hers.  I will take a few pictures this week of her paintings and put together a Thursday 13.

She does have a LARGE collection of art supplies and empty tins for storing those items in, but in her defense men do think in simpler terms and this is just a meeting of the minds discussion.  And in his defense they should be getting rid of most of this as she is now in a assisted living home and will not be able to use these items again.  Donating them to the church or a school while they are still usable would be best, but can’t be forced.  I pray that I will have more grace regarding these type of decisions if I reach that point and give up things more willingly, but none of us can ever be in one another’s shoes and truly know what we would do.

  • Also called trade rat. a large, bushy-tailed rodent, Neotoma cinerea, of North America, noted for carrying off small articles to store in its nest.
  • A person who collects, saves, or hoards useless small items or an old prospector or guide.

HOARD 

  • a supply or accumulation that is hidden or carefully guarded for preservation, future use, etc…  
  • to accumulate money, food, or the like, in a hidden or carefully guarded place for preservation, future use, etc…
Long story short (I know too late), I have decided it is time to take back MY life.  So, over the next couple of months I will be making some changes.  Some big, some small, but ALL necessary to be myself and get a handle on MY life.
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Basil and Pine Nut Pesto

If you could bottle up the smell of summer.  Save it for one of those rainy days in the middle of winter.  When nothing seems to be going right and seasonal affective disorder has officially sunk in.  What scent would you choose?

Me personally?  I would want basil pesto.  I would want it to ooze out of my every pore so that I could smell nothing else for days.

I would want to be able to pull out a jar of it.  Open it up.  And be instantly hit with the smell of sweet basil laced with garlic.

And I wouldn’t stop there.  I would want to taste it, because isn’t taste linked to your sense of memory as well?  Pesto and tortellini salad with tomatoes, fresh mozzarella, and black olives.  Pesto, tomato, and grilled cheese panini.  Pesto pizza.  Pesto on a spoon.  Eaten just because.  Just so.  Just.

Pesto.

Pesto is probably one of the simplest sauces you can make and also one of the most versatile.  You can make it with basil and pine nuts.  A classic.

Or you can go slightly insane.  As I have.  Many a time.  And mix and match your herbs and nuts.  Just about anything goes.  Basil and pistachio.  Basil and walnuts. Cilantro and pine nuts.  Rosemary and walnuts.

Just keep the ratios about the same.  And go wild.

Do a little dance.  Make a little love.  Get down tonight.

Basil and Pine Nut Pesto
1 large tub basil (I would say about 2-3 cups)
4 cloves garlic
1/4 cup pine nuts
1/2 cup parmesan cheese
2 tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper to taste

Combine all ingredients in a food processor.  Process until smooth.  Add salt and pepper to taste.

NOTE – this freezes incredibly well.  Just omit the parmesan cheese and you’re good to go!

Glazed Stuffed Pork Chops

Glazed Stuffed Pork Chops

4 VERY thick pork chops
8 slices oatnut bread
butter
1/2 teaspoon thyme
1/2 teaspoon garlic salt
1/2 teaspoon white pepper
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon red pepper flakes
1/2 cup apricot pineapple jam, room temperature
1 tablespoon peach schnapps
1 large lemon, juiced

  • Preheat oven to 350°.
  • Slit each pork chop along 2 sides to create a large pocket.
  • *Toast each slice of bread well and then lightly butter.
  • Cut each piece into small squares.
  • Toss with thyme, garlic salt and pepper.
  • Stuff each pork chop with 1/3 cup of mixture.
  • Whisk together the jam, peach schnapps, red pepper flakes, ginger and lemon juice.
  • Place chops in a square greased baking dish.
  • Arrange remaining stuffing around the edges.
  • Glaze chops and stuffing tops.
  • Bake uncovered 30 minutes.
  • Turn chops, glaze chops and stuffing again. Bake another 30 minutes.

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Beans Don’t Burn In The Kitchen, Beans Don’t Burn on The Grill

Barbecue baked beans are as common a visitor to the summer picnic table as ants are. Of course, the beans are more welcome.

Trevor was helping smoke some spare ribs last weekend on his offset smoker, so I thought I’d make some beans to go with them.


There are an infinite number of BBQ baked bean recipes but this is the quick and easy version my mother taught me eons ago.

Easy BBQ Baked Beans
My momma

1 28 oz can Bush’s Baked Beans (Homestyle)
1/2 cup sweet BBQ sauce (I prefer Blues Hog brand for this)
1/4 cup yellow mustard
1/4 cup brown sugar
1/2 ea onion, diced (or in this case, a boiler onion sliced into rings)
1 Tbs BBQ rub (Whatever your favorite one is)
1 TBS Worchestershire sauce
1/2 cup chopped BBQ pork or brisket

Mix all ingredients in a small casserole dish and bake for 1 hour at 350f.


Like I said, quick and EASY.

For me, I have to have meat in my beans, it just isn’t the same with out it. I also like more of a spicy kick but the one I listed here is very mild for my family.

What do you like to put in your baked beans?

RICOTTA PANCAKES

  2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
  2 teaspoons baking powder
  1/2 teaspoon baking soda
  1 1/2 tablespoon sugar
  1/2 teaspoon salt
  2 large eggs, separated
  2 cups milk
  1/2 cup ricotta, well drained
  1/2 teaspoon vanilla
  • Set ricotta in a fine mesh strainer about 30 minutes before you start cooking, to drain off excess liquid.
  • Whisk together the flour, baking powder, sugar, and salt in a bowl.
  • Combine ricotta, milk, egg yolks and vanilla in a separate bowl.
  • Beat the egg whites with an electric mixer until stiff.
  • Add the dry ingredients to the ricotta and milk mixture, stirring gently until just combined.
  • Whisk in a small amount of the egg whites to lighten the batter, then fold in the remaining whites.
  • Heat a griddle over medium-high heat, and brush the surface with butter.
  • Use a ladle or measuring scoop to pour batter onto the griddle. Cook pancakes for about 3 or 4 minutes, then flip, cooking until both sides are golden brown.
  • Spread lemon curd between pancakes and dust with powdered sugar or serve with syrup and/or fruit.

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