Category: FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Need I say more? Evidently yes based on what I see in everyday life. Just this past weekend, I observed at least a dozen occasions where this was NOT being practiced. When I was young I was taught to say please, thank you, I’m sorry, excuse me and a variety of other niceties that tend to make life more pleasant as well as show respect for my elders.

Though the reasons for many things have changed, the act of doing them has not. For example, in Victorian days a man escorting a woman on the street would walk on the street or curb side of the woman to keep her from being splashed by mud. These days, a man still does it, but now more for safety.

Social amenities are still in fashion despite women not being the frail creatures once thought. I know feminists everywhere will hate me, but I LIKE when my husband opens the door for me, stands when I leave the table at a nice restaurant, takes his hat off indoors or walks on the street side. After all these years we have developed an instinct for being courteous to each other.

As a society we have wandered away from many day to day courtesies. We as parents have the responsibility to create the adults of tomorrow and that training begins at home.  That is pure fact.  I recently overheard a couple of moms out having lunch complaining about how their kids were not learning manners at school or in daycare.  HELLO?  Once again many feminists world wide will be upset with me, but I truly blame some of this on the parents.  It is not up to the schools or daycare to teach the children manners.  My highest respect is for the stay at home moms as they have the hardest job in the world.  Many common courtesies are no longer practiced by many families and/or enforced by parents, but that stay at home mom is going to expect certain levels of courtesy and be available to see the beginning of bad habits forming.

One of the examples of the need for everyday manners is on public transportation.  Awhile back I was on a subway when a young mother carrying a baby got on as did an elderly gentleman with a cane.  The car was full and not one man or teenager got up and offered their seat to either of them.  I was embarrassed for us as a society!

There are some personal habits that should be addressed, but based on today’s casual acceptance I will only mention and then leave the interpretation to the reader: men removing hats indoors, slouching/posture in general, elbows on the table while eating,  chewing with your mouth closed,  belching/burping in public,  women in dresses sitting in a ladylike manner,  disposing of your gum appropriately,  smoking in public,  being a good neighbor,  personal  space/crowding and the list goes on and on.

I have seen many well behaved children and truly appreciate the effort their parents put into their training. I just get so disappointed that so many other parents are readily allowing less than acceptable in their lives as well as their children’s. The ME generation does NOT have to be here to stay.  Hubby and I went out for a nice leisurely afternoon lunch today at a little restaurant we like to frequent.  It is very quaint and scenic.  Halfway through our lunch a young family came in (the kids were about 2 and 5).  Mom and dad sat at the bar and ordered a drink leaving the kids to wander.  HELLO??  The 2 year old wanted something the 5 year old had and when she didn’t get it started a tantrum that the parents were ignoring and the rest of us were enduring.  NO ONE said anything!  I was beside myself.  Normally I would have been pissed, but not said anything.  Today was not normal – I had a splitting headache and was just beginning to relax when this all occurred.  I calmly walked over to the parents and asked if they wouldn’t mind taking the little girl outside to calm her down.  They were quite insulted by MY nerve as they put it.  I told them I was insulted by their nerve.  They were clueless!!  I actually had to spell it out for them that while everyone was trying to endure their little girl’s tantrum, it was not our responsibility to do so.  We were all out spending our hard earned money on a relaxing day which did not include providing daycare for them as their children ran around unsupervised.

While there are even more situations we could address because our entire life is full of them (strangers, prejudice, those with handicaps, unexpected visitors, hospitals, church services, etc… the ultimate rule of thumb is and always will be the Golden Rule for ALL situations. 

At dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life.  One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He argued, “What’s a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?”  To stress his point he said to another guest; “You’re a teacher,  Bonnie. Be honest. What do you  make?” 

Bonnie, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness replied, “You want to know what I make? (She paused for a  second, then began…)

• “Well, I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.
• I make kids sit through 40 minutes of class time when their parents can’t make them sit for 5 without an I Pod, Game Cube or movie rental.
• You want to know what I make? (She paused  again and looked at each and every person at the  table)
• I make kids wonder.
• I make them question.
• I  make them apologize and mean  it.
• I make them have respect and take responsibility for their actions.
• I teach them to write and  then I make them write. Keyboarding isn’t  everything.
• I make them read, read, read.
• I make them show all their work in math.  They use their God given brain, not the man-made  calculator.
• I make my students from other countries learn everything they need to know about English while preserving their unique cultural identity.
• I make my classroom a place where all my students feel safe.
• Finally, I make them understand that if they use the gifts they were given, work hard, and follow their hearts, they can succeed in life.  (Bonnie paused one last time and then continued.)
• Then, when people try to judge  me by what I make, with me knowing money isn’t everything, I can hold my head up high and pay no attention because they are ignorant. You want to  know what I make? I  MAKE A DIFFERENCE.  What do you make Mr. CEO?“

His jaw dropped, he went  silent.

Teaching is…the profession that makes all other professions!!!

One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name.

Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.

It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers.

That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual.

On Monday she gave each student his or her list.  Before long, the entire class was smiling. ‘Really?’ she heard whispered. ‘I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!’ and, ‘I didn’t know others liked me so much,’ were most of the comments..

No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn’t matter.

The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of students moved on.

Several years later, one of the students was killed in Viet  Nam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before.. He looked so handsome, so mature.

The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin.. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin..

As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. ‘Were you Mark’s math teacher?’ he asked. She nodded: ‘yes.’ Then he said: ‘Mark talked about you a lot.’

After the funeral, most of Mark’s former classmates went together to a luncheon. Mark’s mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher..

‘We want to show you something,’ his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket ‘They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it.’

Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark’s classmates had said about him.

‘Thank you so much for doing that,’ Mark’s mother said. ‘As you can see, Mark treasured it.’

All of Mark’s former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, ‘I still have my list. It’s in the top drawer of mydesk at home.’

Chuck’s wife said, ‘Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album.’

‘I have mine too,’ Marilyn said. ‘It’s in my diary’

Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group. ‘I carry this with me at all times,’ Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: ‘I think we all saved our lists’

That’s when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.

The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we don’t know when that one day will be.

So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late.

Check your shampoo bottle label.  I don’t know WHY I didn’t figure this out sooner!!!!  It’s the shampoo I use in the shower!

When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body and (duh!) printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning,

Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start using Dawn dish soap instead.  Their label reads,

Problem Solved!!!  If I don’t answer the phone I’ll be in the shower!!!