Category: MISC

Fun email ~ The Pastor’s Ass

A Pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.  The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.

The local paper read:  PASTOR’S ASS OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the Pastor  not to enter the donkey in another race…

The next day, the local paper headline read:  BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR’S ASS.
This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the Pastor to get rid of the donkey..

The Pastor decided to give it to a Nun in a nearby Convent..

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:   NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The Bishop fainted!

He informed the Nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.

The next day the papers read:  NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.

The next day the headlines read:  NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
The Bishop was buried the next day.

The moral of the story is …. Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery It can even shorten your life…..So be yourself and enjoy life to the fullest.

Stop worrying about everyone else’s ass and you’ll be a lot happier and live longer!

Fire Day Friday: Mediterranean Grilled Chicken

 

 Do you ever get home from work and realize you are just not in the mood to cook?  It doesn’t happen to me too often, but when it does, I find myself facing a dilemma.  To cook or not to cook?  If I don’t cook, what will we do for dinner?  Heat up chicken nuggets or frozen burritos?  UGH.. no thank you… I mean if I’m going to go through the effort of even doing that, why not go the extra step and cook something a bit more healthy.  Hence the dilemma… I don’t want to cook, but I don’t want to eat junk either.


So what’s a girl to do?

This girl just figures out a way to put as little time and as little effort into dinner as I possible can.  I guess that’s why my grill is my go to device in those situations.  I use propane, so it’s simple to click a button, let it preheat, and slap some meat on it. Of course, the fast and easy way must also be a tasty way, and this recipe is just that!  It’s simple, it’s flavorful, and it’s perfect for those nights where you want something good, but you don’t want to have to put a lot of effort into it.

Mediterranean Grilled Chicken  Adapted from Pam, For the Love of Cooking
Printable Recipe 

Ingredients:
4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
1/4 cup mayonnaise
2 Tablespoons lemon juice
2 Tablespoons red wine vinegar
2 garlic cloves, finely minced
2 1/2 teaspoons dried oregano
Salt and pepper

Directions:

In a bowl, mix together the mayo, lemon juice, vinegar, garlic, and oregano until smooth.  Season with salt and pepper.  Place the chicken in a resealable bag or shallow dish and pour half of the sauce over the chicken.  Allow to marinate for at least 1 hour.  Cover the reserved sauce and leave in refrigerator until you are ready to grill the chicken.

Preheat your grill to 400 degrees.  Oil the grill grates.  Remove the chicken from the bag and place directly over the flame.  Allow to grill for 8-10 minutes per side or until the chicken is no longer pink in the middle.  Serve with the reserved sauce and enjoy!

A sense of Irony ~ a trip to the C and Sea

We have a huge family!  And best to my knowledge there has been very little major illness in the immediate folds.  This makes me wonder how it is that my favorite BIL and I are both diagnosed with Cancer with in weeks of each other.  The irony comes with hubby and I deciding to stay on to help with my aunt and be in the right place when I was diagnosed to be treated by one of the best cancer treatment facilities in the world.  I know I’m blessed by the best doctor and team, but even more so to know that now my BIL is here for treatment from his awesome doctors.
While this not a celebration for either of us it was awesome to see our closest family and spend some time together.  We were both free of tests and appointments today and we took our act on the road.  We started in Galveston at Beachtown and walking the beach.

 SIL & Me
SIL, BIL, NEPHEW (yep he’s older than me)
Hubby (brother to SIL) and I
Where we encountered a beach full of Man o’ Wars, but there was something wrong.  None of them had an tentacles that we could find.  So I went on an internet search to see what was up and I found that after strong onshore winds, you can often find beached Portuguese man-of-war with their tentacles stuck in the sand. A closer look will usually reveal a crab beneath the surface winding up the long blue string.
 We also found many mole crab holes with recent digging.
From there we walked the Strand, checked out a few stores and bought the important stuff – thanks so much SIL the apple and fudge are very much appreciated!, had drinks with chips and salsa and visited.
And then we visited the Kemah Boardwalk and walked some more, ate some more, fed some birds, forgot to get someone to take a picture of the 5 of us so we could all be in the same picture, visited some more and laughed a lot.
We stopped to make plane boarding reservations and then to get a serious flat tire fixed.
Then we ended the day at a favorite restaurant (you guessed it) with more food and drink, lots of well wishes and hugs!  Now we pray for positive. half glass full results for us both!  It was my first big day out and I’m exhausted, but in a “I’m so glad we have a loving family” way!

BAKED WHITE FISH ~ CLASSIC GOOD EATS

2 teaspoons peanut oil    
1 small bunch green onions, sliced thin
1 teaspoon paprika
2 small kiwis, cleaned and sliced thin
2-4 white fish, cleaned and scaled, 2 pounds each
salt & pepper to taste   
3 tablespoons white wine    
3 tablespoons CHAMPAGNE DRESSING (or substitute fish or chicken stock)  
2 tablespoons butter, melted
1 lemon, sliced

  • This will work with other whole lean fish and cuts or ‘roasts’ of halibut or pink salmon.
  • Adjust the cooking time according to the thickness and density of the fish.
  • Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.
  • Spray baking dish well with PURE.
  • Rinse the fish well inside and out, pat dry, season lightly with salt, pepper and paprika and lay side by side in a shallow baking dish.
  • Layer lemon slices loosely over fish and season again.
  • Pour  the stock, dressing and ending with the butter over each filet.
  • Make a loose tent of foil over the tail of the fish and place in the oven.
  • Bake, rotating the pan once halfway through the cooking time, until a skewer easily enters the thickest part of the fish, 25 to 30 minutes.
  • Taste for seasoning and adjust if necessary.

Turkey or Chicken Primavera

I made a turkey a few weeks ago.  I like to shred the leftovers into 10 oz. portions (about 2 cups) and keep them in the freezer.  Then they are ready for a quick dinner if needed.  This of course could be done with chicken as well.
This is kinda my clean out the refrigerator meal.  I like to throw in as many veggies as possible!  You can custom make this with whatever veggies you like.  I sometimes will add garlic to the sauce as well as I like it garlicky!
Turkey Primavera

1/2 box Rotini or Penne pasta, Barilla Plus (7 ounces)

10 ounces turkey or chicken, diced or shredded
Cooking spray
Salt and pepper
1 medium zucchini squash, cut into circles
1 medium yellow squash, cut into circles
1 onion, chopped
1 red pepper, chopped
1 head broccoli, cut into florets (1/2 lb)
2 carrot sticks, peeled and chopped
3 small tomatoes, seeded and diced (plum tomatoes)
2 garlic cloves, crushed

For White Sauce:
3 tablespoons I can’t believe it’s not butter, light
3 tablespoons flour
2 cups milk, 1 %
4 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
Salt and pepper and garlic powder

  1. In medium saucepan, cook pasta according to package instructions. Drain and add to large serving bowl. 
  2. If chicken or turkey is not cooked, place in large skillet, saute diced chicken in olive oil and salt and pepper for 6-8 minutes, stirring often. Once chicken has cooked through, transfer to plate, cool and dice.
  3. Add onion and red pepper to a skillet and saute in cooking spray for about 4 – 5 minues. 
  4. Add zucchini and broccoli to skillet and steam/saute for 3-4 minutes with 1/4 cup of water. Add the tomatoes during the last minute. 
  5. Make white sauce in small sauce pan. Add all the ingredients and stir continually until thickened. Do not boil.
  6. Toss pasta, cooked chicken or turkey, sauteed veggies with parmesan sauce. Season with salt, pepper and garlic powder to taste.  I like lots of garlic powder!
Total calories = 2050
5 huge servings = 410 calories

CRESCENT CHICKEN AND CREAM CHEESE BUNDLES

The bundles are basically chicken, cream cheese and butter.  I usually double the recipe, because each of my children and my husband eat two of them. If any are leftover I put them in lunchboxes for the next day.

CRESCENT CHICKEN AND CREAM CHEESE BUNDLES
1 package (3 ounces) cream cheese, softened
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon pepper
1/4 tsp garlic powder
2 cups cubed cooked chicken
2 tablespoons milk
1 tablespoon chopped onion
1 tube (8 ounces) refrigerated crescent rolls
1/4 cup seasoned bread crumbs
3 tablespoons butter, melted, divided

  • In a bowl, beat cream cheese, 2 tablespoons butter, salt ,pepper and garlic powder until smooth. Stir in chicken, milk, and onion. Unroll crescent roll dough and separate into four rectangles; place on an ungreased baking sheet an press perforations together.
  • Spoon 1/2 cup chicken mixture into the center of each rectangle. Bring edges up to the center and pinch to seal. Brush with remaining butter; sprinkle with crumbs.
  • Bake at 350° for 20-25 minutes or until golden.

Yield: 2-4 servings.

SPICY LEMON CHICKEN

  • 4 to 6 pieces of chicken (breasts and legs)
  • 1 (6 oz.) can frozen lemonade, thawed
  • 2 tbsp. brown sugar
  • 3 tbsp. ketchup
  • 1 tbsp. APPLE CIDER vinegar
  • 2 tbsp. cornstarch
  • 2 tbsp. cold water

Preparation:

Arrange chicken pieces in slow cooker. Combine lemonade concentrate, brown sugar, ketchup and vinegar; mix well. Pour lemonade mixture over chicken. Cover and cook on HIGH for 3 to 4 hours or LOW for 6 to 8 hours. Remove chicken from crockpot and cover to keep hot. Transfer liquid to saucepan over medium-low heat. Skim fat; combine cornstarch and cold water and add slowly to liquid, while stirring. When thickened, serve with chicken along with hot cooked rice.
Serves 4 to 6.

or

  • 1 can (12 ounces) frozen lemonade concentrate, thawed
  • 2 tablespoons brown sugar
  • 2 tablespoons soy sauce
  • 1 teaspoon garlic powder
  • 3/4 teaspoon minced fresh mint or 1/4 teaspoon dried mint
  • 4 pounds bone-in chicken breast halves (8 ounces each)
  • In a large resealable bag, combine the first five ingredients. Remove half of the marinade to a small bowl; cover and refrigerate. Add chicken to the bag; seal and turn to coat. Refrigerate overnight, turning occasionally.
  • Drain and discard marinade. Grill, covered, over medium heat for 10 minutes on each side, basting occasionally with reserved marinade. Grill 5-10 minutes longer or until chicken juices run clear; basting and turning several times.

OR

aprons 3